Thursday, December 9, 2010
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
and if hearts be tired-
Love you Forever times Ten.
So moon and little hummingbird are smiling with each other. Love beyond performance and perspective, amen.
Shipped this out today- it's for a little one about to be born.
Friday, November 26, 2010
Here’s the new polar bear painting:
Am reading the book Eye of Spirit by Ken Wilber. Mike Cohen has been teaching me new stuff lately and suggested the book especially for its chapters on art. And hey- Vincent Van Gogh’s words sound a lot like Mother Teresa’s!
One from Emerson via Ken:
“These roses under my window make no reference to former roses or to better ones; they are for what they are; they exist with God today. There is no time for them. There is simply the rose; it is perfect in every moment of its existence. But man postpones or remembers; he does not live in the present, but with reverted eye laments the past, or heedless of the riches that surround him, stands on tiptoe to foresee the future. He cannot be happy and strong until he too lives with nature in the present, above time.”
And Ken on Integral Art:
“That all-pervading Beauty is not an exercise in creative imagination. It is the actual structure of the universe. That all-pervading Beauty is in truth the very nature of the Kosmos right now. It is not something you have to imagine, because it is the actual structure of perception in all domains. If you remain in the eye of Spirit, every object is an object of radiant Beauty. If the doors of perception are cleansed, the entire Kosmos is your lost and found Beloved, the Original Face of primordial Beauty, forever, and forever, and endlessly forever. And in the face of that stunning Beauty, you will completely swoon into your own death, never to be seen from or heard again, except on those tender nights when the wind gently blows through the hills and the mountains, quietly calling your name.”
Thursday, November 18, 2010
The Show! The show was grand. Sarah said, "It's cool, you know, how it's a creative experience where everybody participates sharing their skills." A co-created event! The kirtan was a heartslam. Katie flew up from South Carolina and made sweet potato soup. Dad, Susan, and Kaitlyn flew up from Florida and trimmed evergreens and lit candles and fires. Chrysanthie was a yurt angel and also decorated the entire house, Steve ran the whole place, Roger screened a new film, Roger showed his rainbow water colors, Sarah brought bushels of food she grew, Olivia made dressings of plants, Doug did the sound like a pro (cause he is), Scott built and built, Christina fed us, Deborah breathed us and twinkle lit, Tammy made ginger tea and little bows, Jason held some space and baked seeds, Sara decorated signs and necklaces, Heather photographed, Diane made Belgium chocolates trala la la.
Our time is rolling in. I smell the pines singing.
What were we waiting for? For some of us to catch up? To what? We're all here.
We grow wide as the breath of the sea.
We grow deep as the vein of gold into the heart of the earth.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
It's just before 3:30 and, well, here is my dream. I woke up at 2am from a dream where Steve was trying to bring home a green python. He moved next to me in the bed and I shot up with a yelp thinking that the snake had found me. I got up and drank water, feeling scared and thought maybe I'll just go downstairs and sit on the couch- but I saw the emerald python wrapping around my neck and swallowing my head, and fearing that it was waiting for me downstairs, I went to bed instead and snuggled Steve's back. As I drifted back into the night feeling, the snake raised its head and stared at me, and terror rose again. I said- Are you friend or foe?! Are you friend or foe?! The python stared with its green steely stare, seeming to become larger and larger. The snake was neither evil nor good. I realized that it was not going away, so I looked up to its unblinking eyes and asked- do what you came to do.
At that moment a white owl perched north in the trees above our heads, and then another owl of the brown sort behind. Then from the west a rainbow feathered owl alighted on a branch, making me smile. There with the looming python overhead, who was now standing twice as high as me, I lept out of my skin! I was a five year old bright and light. I hopped in between the body and wing of the rainbow owl. He put me in a little pouch he had. The little pouch was a leathery nut shell with gold trim. As I looked down, the snake ate the rest of me. I was howling miserably (the old me getting swallowed) -it really was unpleasant- this me that I primp and pluck and evaluate for problems. The python just unhooked its jaw and began the long elegant slippery swallow. Before my body of accumulations had been fully eaten, the owls flew away with me. Hafiz was echoing in my mind saying, "Why doubt the future of a clay bowl that has been flung into the sky?" Then I remembered us and dolphins. I said, "See? everything is ok now, watch the dolphins. They were actually porpoises from our beach growing up- surfing in the waves, leaping for joy and eating fish, swimming in circles high and low. I woke up in my dream on the beach, stretched out naked as a young thing, curiously atop a mellow and soft green tree python. We were both relaxed and drowsy in the sun, my feet and head lengthwise on her, lounging on a stone wall near the beach sand of the porpoises playing. But then the sun was blocked out, and a giant giant scaly serpent rose up- the likes of which made my green python look like a garden snake. It stood as high as a building, seething. My body in the bed was a storm of terror. In the eyes of this snake were yellow fires. I felt like it was evil and had to be killed, but it was too big. I yelled, "Navratri! Navratri!" Which doesn't make sense I guess, yelling Nine Nights! But Durga (I guess?) swooped in, glowing white and golden, and with a curved machete swiftly decapitated the thing. She was in the clouds and yelled, "Watch for the blood!" like the snake blood was dangerous. She bid me hop onto her blade and go with her. I hopped onto the blade, but by the time she had drawn me on top of the blade near her she shifted into another being. I was about to say thank you but I peered at her face and asked, "Wait. Who are you?" She smiled a crooked smile, and a drop of black blood, the tiniest bit, oozed from her canine tooth. Chills ran through me, and I lept off the blade onto the ground, where inexplicably all of the buckets of dark blood that had been spilled from the snake gave birth to innumerable progeny of the exact one that fell. We were in some in-between world. Half up and the other half slithering, the massive snakes traveled in armies towards our people. It was like they were not on earth, but were making their way quickly.
I thought to pray, but the snakes would have smelled a prayer, so I wrapped myself inside an egg as they went past and wished for winged snakes of the seraphim variety. Soon a trumpet blast cracked the earth and a rumble shook the ground, and a trumpeting elephant the power of 1000 elephants led a charge of its family. They stampeded the snakes without spilling blood. It was a fiery battle that lasted a long time. At some point early on a mother elephant put me, the egg, in the crook of her neck, then later inside a songbird nest. The sulfur storm of smoke and fire continued and the elephants went about madly, and the friendly nest was a soft cocoon. The breeze swayed the branches and a kind bird twirtled nearby. I pealed open the tiniest bit of the egg shell from inside to see the blue sky outside and the cherry blossoms blooming. Seems everything worked out alright.
"About the woodlands I will go
To watch the cherries hung with snow."
Steve woke up in the night too so now we are both in his office. I read him this story and he said, "I'm glad the elephants came with their trumpets." Me too! :)
Friday, October 1, 2010
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Here's what I'm working on this week- it's a human heart. And inside the Heart is a baby dolphin before birth! This situation kind of thrills me to no end.
When I was taking the picture of the canvas just now the goldfinches were zooming in for their daily thistle, so I snapped a photo. When this goldfinch was munching away he tweetled, "Listen, doodle, when you put up my pretty picture tell my friends they can have their seeds and eat them too."
Today's the last day of summer! Steve and Scott and Roger and I are going to go plunge ourselves into the ocean and daydream on the sand. Let's declare our visions- tomorrow is the Solstice and Full Moon! The Sun and the Moon are gonna be DANCING on the CEILING!
Monday, September 6, 2010
Two months ago Farmer Bob said maybe maybe if he asked his wife Alla on my behalf I might receive a peacock feather from the peacock. I squirmed with excitement for the possibility. Time passed until it was this Saturday and Farmer Bob pulled me aside with Alla. They were talking to me and I felt important. Alla said O! The feathers! Come come I want to give these to you. She gathered a great bundle of peacock feathers and put them in my arms. She's protective of the feathers and loves their beauty. She said I am giving these to you! I thought to myself, this is a serious supernova of awesomeness.
All the feathers were really long. Before I went out the door she said, "O! I have this beautiful small one to give to you too." It was my favorite. It was dense and sparkly and I said to myself- I can decorate the house with all these flowers, but this small one is just for me.
I had taken friends visiting for the weekend to the farm with me. As we returned home with tomatoes and feathers in our arms, one friend asked, "O can I have the small feather?" I said, "Of course," with a knot in my throat and handed it to her. Alone tonight I thought of the beautiful little feather and felt sick to my stomach and cried.
Before Friday night I finished this painting and the one in the post below. Most of the Goldfinch painting was done in Cindy Shefield's garden here in Stafford that's full of roses and goldfinches. My friends Jo and Kirby Judd call goldfinches "flying daffodils". I put a thistle feeder up for them in front of my window and watch them land and eat through the day. They're so cute! Two birdie couples often come at dinnertime taking turns munching on seeds and singing about their meal- fluttering here and there. Sometimes they wake me up from sleep in the early morning with their soft little sunrise song and I feel I feel I feel so glad with them.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Craig took this picture of a woman hard at work. Since the curtains are billowing I think this means he literally shot the breeze.
Here's the new project! I'm painting this on the kitchen wall above the sink. The image is yellowy because I just thought to take a picture of it tonight, though the wall is actually white. This design is an illustration by John Marro for a new vegan restaurant in San Francisco called Gracias Madre. These people are so cool! And I just love John's picture! He made something really pretty of the Lady here and I'm much obliged to have her company.
Am beginning to know that the greatest gifts in our lives are so big that they are difficult to perceive. I've been unclear about the meaning of the word "humble" for a long time. Today I feel that one aspect of it is thankfulness. Just thankful to have a body, thankful to be able to breathe. Thankful to live in a place with water and food and peace. All the help from our friends! It's a pleasure to cogitate on the prayers that come with existence and the ones that have been tucked into this life. People that held us as babies wished so many beautiful things for us. All kinds of beings who love us hold a secret dream for us, and that's a whole lot of goodwill floating around.
a stone for posterity
music for the one second heaven
flowers for the new day's birth
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Thursday, August 5, 2010
I had a friend that would greet my sister and I with that each time she saw us. "Kitty Cats! How you doing?" ...in some kind of fake Dutch accent.
The One Night Show
is Saturday, November 13th at 7pm.
A few weeks ago I started a two week green juice cleanse for cleanliness, beauty and discipline. And at the same time I was also bit by a small tick, which infected my blood with a bacteria. The nature of the bacteria is that it first lives in the blood and then bores into the bone and later the brain and heart. So you have to kill it early and with aggressiveness. Maybe it's fair to say that I've been re-purifying my blood. And all's well of course. It's interesting how some microorganisms are compatible with human life; they can be parasitic but they're parasitic in a way that's not too demanding on the host. Some parasites, though, actively disintegrate the host.
Yesterday was such a day that I poured myself a glass of wine before the sun set, and rocked back and forth in my chair. I've seen people use wine to comfort themselves so I gave it a try. Early into my attempt Steve knocked on the door and said, "Did you forget the farm share?" I did! So I went over to the farm and as soon as I walked on the earth farmers Caroline and Ronda said, "Shannon come here, come here, you have to learn about the hookworm. It's disgusting but you have to see this." On the first towering tomato plant in a luscious row, on an eye-level leaf was a large plump green caterpillar. This caterpillar was covered in innumerable small elliptical white bumps or eggs that sprung from its back, like a thick-quilled porcupine. Caroline said that each of these white things was a pupa from a wasp that had deposited the larva underneath the skin of the caterpillar. "These pupa are eating the caterpillar as it eats the tomato plant, and eventually they are going to suck this plump caterpillar dry and hatch into wasps." I felt a gag coming on. She showed me a black shriveled caterpillar remain with some of the pupa still growing on it. "It seems the larva are deposited beneath the skin and eat their way out."
I am more than awed at the power of what can get under our skin. Isn't a joke!
Last night I felt a wild fountain come rising up within me. It was a ruthless devotion to breathing and living. To self-determination. There were knights in white satin (there are!) galloping wildly through the woods, mud flying, swords ready. And there was an elephant, she and I touched head to head. Her massive imposing presence, her nose soft and sweet. This human world is full of junk, full of infestations. We kill and hunt every day. Otherwise look- we end up a caterpillar sucked dry before the transformation occurs. Guard your life! Kill what needs to be killed beneath the skin. There is so much that can die. We are powerful hunters affecting our ecology. A grown man has a backbone. We can't be real men if we don't determine ourselves, if we don't know when to strike. And I think we have to be grown men before we can be grown women.
Can we get dizzy from our oxygen and fall down from the intensity, and then rise up again from the intensity. Who can hunt without disdain, who can pursue with honor? The exceptional liver of life is one who is not eager to die, but one who is eager to breathe. Everday the sun shines and it bursts and burns into itself. The sun dies too. But really, are you gonna buy that crap? The spring rises from the earth and bubbles into the sphere. The air comes down and touches the sphere. I saw us a pyramid, the apex. The narrow eye of the needle in the middle of the hour glass. The place where each grain passes through. The powers funnel down in 3-D to the top of the pyramid. The powers rush up from below and swirl inside to the top of the pyramid. And we meet. In equanimity. In complete terror. Terror and wonder untie. Horror and Beauty kiss. Virtue and Squalor weave a thread. The Fresh and the Putrid exchange wafts of floating air. Matter and Anti-matter explode into starry fire. A power rips vicious ravines across the landscape of land and sky, cracking open the infinitely dark expanse. The rain pours down from the sky. The water breaks forth from the rock, miraculous. Dinosaur changes to bird, clothed in the golden fleece. Eternal cloth. Fleshly dress crumbles. Fleshly dress is the eternal. The spot on the back of spider lives forever. Weave your web, catch your prey. Weave your web, let it all pass through. Weave your web, decorate the world. Weave your web, sparkle in the morning dew. Weave your web, billow in the breeze. Weave your web, let your progeny hang from a thread and mature upon it. Weave your we. Weave your we. Weave your web. Weave your web. Weave your web.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
... all beautiful spaces grow wild, never-growling non-events, reaching up and all around in silence. Space. They soften around us as the whispers absorb the cotton ball stars, feeling the sun warm them. Softening around our feet like sweet moss. It is nothing into nothing. And we kiss it- a newborn babe.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
They do say the accordion is the perfect instrument for comedies.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
At once the silken tassel of my purse
Tear, and its Treasure on the Garden throw."
My friend said- Maybe you're not what you thought you were.
And I was waiting for a profound thing.
I like to roll the profound quilt around myself and take a snooze.
Ate a muffin and fell asleep on the bathroom floor
underneath the skylight
and waking up, felt the sun shining like a warm friend
Like a beauty that didn't mind a thing
not a thing at all.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
and hence dissolved of the future-
the solution is dissolution.
Nothing will be re-chorded
The strings are unstrung.
Now our music is free.
Abort the mission. Abort. Abort.
The child has no form.
Give this pearl back to the sea
we crush it with all these collective gems
jewels across time.
And rising like bubbles,
there are sparklings across the heavens
And falling like pebbles,
settle sparklings on the earth.
Here we are afloat
between clear water
Monday, June 28, 2010
As humans, we open the gate.
The Hounds of Love are already trained.
These beauty beasts relentlessly crowd and cry~
Open the Gate
(Well, I feel so good, everybody's getting higher
Better take it easy, 'cause the place is on fire
Been a hard day, nothing went too good
Now I'm gonna relax, honey, everybody should)
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
I'm learning a few things with this painting. This one is about integrating parts that don't belong at first glance. Sometimes when a visitor sees a pieces in the middle of its painting, they make a concerned look on their face that says something like, "Ooo...uhh.. I dunno about this one." I used to get scared when I saw that look. (Know that feeling? Like: shitballs it's all over now, gulp.) But that's art- isn't that what art is? You hold one thing in this hand, and another thing in this hand, and you put it together. Integrate! And that's what the heart does, right?
This is the new Starburst piece as it comes along.
Something grand is happening today! The Salet roses are opening up to the world. Here's where they were at 7:30 am. GOooo team!
"It is a fact that of the capacities which the soul has acquired in its transition through a stage of development, nothing is lost. But when a new capacity is acquired, the one previously gained assumes a different form. It then no longer manifests itself in its own character, but as a basis for the new capacity." -Rudulph Steiner, "Cosmic Memory"
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Hey! Look at you standing up, prince!
The roses are blooming downtown...
The great late second millennium command to "follow your heart"
And if you do...
But heart is invisible
as are shining ships
on shining seas
Sing some songs of the sea
Watch the world turn
Wind lets a child breathe for free
I say I will not chase another port
or visit the clean infirmaries
I will not drink, I will not gamble
Even quit my job as a missionary.
Dragin' feet on the starboard side
Just to see the fish
What's your wish?
To watch the fish!
I wondered about the here and all the enough in
Then what happened?
In my bath my eyes got droopy
O it's time for my snoozy
Guess I dropped my head into the water.
Cause I awoke with a jerk and a splash!
He laughed and asked,
Know how to get here?
When stuff happens like that.
Laugh laugh laugh-
the fright is in your own friendly bath.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Your momma has been singing all about you!
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Terrence McKenna said, "Unconditional positive regard. That's the example of nature."
There was a big storm that came through here at midnight into Thursday. The wind roared like mad through the evergreens and rain pounded on the roof and lightning lit up the night like it was day. I sat at the top of the stairs scared and thought of Jesus. And he became a captain on a ship. An explorer! There were waves around our vessel crashing violently. Calmly in the sea spray he pulled a map from his coat. He spread it out, and tracing a line with his finger, said nonchalantly:
These are the coordinates. You'll recognize our trajectory.
Also, the country we're sailing into doesn't operate on the currency from our last shore. Can you generate the new one yourself right now?
In the... in the middle of this storm?
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Plants in the backyard growing without cultivation...
maybe they're in your backyard too!
This is Lambs Quarters, and is sometimes sold as Wild Spinach. It can be blended with fruit to make a smoothie, or used as a salad base- whatever way spinach might be prepared.
This is sorrel. Sorrel has distinctive leaves that are shaped like a fish. Sorrel leaves have a lemony flavor, and taste great in a salad. To supplement my diet with sorrel, I pick a few leaves (or flowers now that they're blooming) when I'm outside and chew on them as I walk around.
This is red clover. The University of Maryland Medical Center says that red clover may have blood-thinning properties, which keeps blood clots from forming. It appears to improve blood flow. Traditionally, it's regarded as helpful in cleansing the liver, as an expectorant, as a diuretic, and as treatment for psoriasis and eczema.
This is white clover. The clovers can be eaten leaves, flowers, and all. White clover flowers have an impressive protein profile. I just pop them in my mouth, but I read that soaking them in salt water for a while tenderizes the flower so that they are gentle enough on human digestion to eat lots and lots.
Generally I eat as many flowers as possible. When they're growing outside, I like at least a flower a day. Energetically, from my perspective, flowers are the beautiful bright joy-bringing beings that through their life and death disperse seeds. I admire the life path they've chosen, so I eat them to be more like them.
To avoid any kind of ill will from a plant, I ask it for permission to pick a flower. The kindness of flowers is overwhelming from my human perspective- they are eager to share themselves at any expense. Some of them don't want to be eaten, picked or touched, and I appreciate that too.
I love to drink spring water! I love to smell roses! I also love to eat parsley! In order to unite this triumvirate of awesomeness, I got out this glass pitcher my sister gave me, filled it with fresh water, plucked an organic rose and placed it into the water (though the rose eventually floats to the top), pinched off some parsley flowers and floated them in the water too, then placed a glass plate atop the pitcher. The pitcher sat in the sun all afternoon, and during that time the heat of the sun helps the rose and parsley release their oils. The plate on top of the pitcher facilitates the necessary condensation process, as opposed to the evaporation process. Then through the night the water gathers moonlight. This morning it went into the refrigerator. Steve and I have been drinking this water today and it tastes so so good. To make it last for a few days, I fill a glass with water then add this parsley rosewater from the pitcher to top it off. It's joyful medicine!